“Very, very special”

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So as most of you have probably seen on my facebook page, instagram or twitter, I am in fact pregnant again! With TWINS! I’ll go back to the beginning of this pregnancy and fill you all in on the latest in the Spilman family saga.

Keith and I have been trying for baby #2 since May of last year. We had moved back to CO, Keith had a great job he loved and I was enjoying being at home and watching Kaleb grow. We knew we wanted to add to our family and I felt strongly about our children being only 2 years apart. Well, as with everything in life, our timing was not the Lord’s. I thought that with proper planning, we would be pregnant quickly. But month after month I was disappointed to find out that I was yet again without child. In December of 2012, we finally went to see a doctor to see if we could get help. We both went through the myriad of tests and were given the “all clear.” The doctor wanted to keep an eye on a large ovarian cyst that I had as he thought that may be the only thing potentially impeding our efforts for baby #2. In February of 2013, my doctor advised that my cyst was not only still there, but was getting larger. He suspected possible endometriosis and suggested immediate removal of the cyst. So, with much trepidation I underwent surgery to remove the cyst. The docs found no evidence of endometriosis (which is REALLY great news as the disease complicates fertility immensely) and gave us the go ahead to start trying again once my cycle returned. Well, a couple of months went by and my cycle never returned. Not having a normal cycle really puts a damper on the “trying” process. My doctor recommended using a medication to help regulate my cycle and ensure ovulation. He said that sometimes after ovarian surgery it can take a couple of cycles to really get back to normal. So, once my cycle FINALLY returned, I took the doctor’s advice and started using a medication to regulate my cycle and bring on ovulation. We were continually reassured that the risk of multiples was almost zero, and I honestly didn’t think I would get pregnant so shortly after my cycle returning.

Well…. fast forward to April 28, 2013. I had been feeling “off” — super nauseous, food wasn’t satisfying and just a general sense of malaise. I had many cycles where I had faux pregnancy symptoms, so I didn’t want to get my hopes up that this was finally our month. The morning of the 28th however, the little stick told me it was time to get my hopes up! TWO pink lines were staring at me. I quickly went under my sink into my stash of pregnancy tests (they start to accumulate after nearly a year of trying) and found a pretty little digital test. I quickly used it and waited.. and waited… and waited. PREGNANT popped up after a few minutes. There is nothing more exciting than seeing it in black and white. I am PREGNANT!! I was shaking, crying, and on my knees thanking God for giving us another baby. I called my mom and we cried together. It was really an amazing moment. Nearly a year of heartbreak and finally, we were pregnant.

I surprised Keith and met him for lunch at his work. I had bought Kaleb a shirt that said “Best Big Brother” that he wore to lunch. Once Keith read the shirt, I whipped out the test that said PREGNANT. He was speechless and immediately asked if I was ok. Of course I was ok, I was more than ok! Keith was concerned because I had been feeling so “off” the few days prior. I assured him that just came with the territory and I was sure all was well.

We had done a few blood tests at the doctors office to confirm the pregnancy and scheduled an ultrasound for 6 weeks 4 days for visual confirmation and to make sure all was well. When you find out you’re pregnant so early on, the first weeks of pregnancy seem to drag on forever! The time finally came to see your little baby and we were so excited! As the doctor prepared the ultrasound machine, we casually chatted about how wonderful it was that I was pregnant on our first try after surgery. Soon the ultrasound machine was ready to go and Keith and I were looking at what appeared to be a sac and a baby! We were so excited. Very quickly we started seeing not one, but two identical sacs with what appeared to be a small baby inside. Keith said he knew immediately, but I waited for verbal confirmation from the doctor. I was kind of hoping maybe he was looking at an ovary or something that I couldn’t decipher. Sure enough, however, the doctor said “I’m seeing two gestational sacs!” With wide eyes Keith and I looked at each other and then I quickly asked, “does this mean TWO babies!?” The doc was still looking around when we all saw the flickering in both sacs — two heartbeats. The doc said that two sacs doesn’t always mean two babies, but in our case it did. We had two heartbeats, both in the 180’s and measuring a few days ahead of where I thought I was. OH MY GOSH…. how on earth could I be pregnant with twins!? After a year of unsuccessful trying, how did two babies manage to snuggle in for the long haul!? To say that we were shocked would be an understatement. My mind suddenly started to fill with dread. I had a hard enough time keeping one little baby safe, how in the world was I going to carry TWO? I quickly asked the doctor about my previous diagnosis with Kaleb, and how this would effect twins. He assured me that a cerclage should hold up just the same for one as it would for two and that my docs would take very good care of me. He also proceeded to tell Keith and I what an anomaly we were. He said that he has very rarely ever seen twins with an infertility diagnosis and immediately following an ovarian surgery. He said that I was just “very, very special.” That’s exactly what every high risk pregnant woman wants to hear!

Keith and I left and called all of our family to let them know we had been doubly blessed! I was feeling a mixture of emotions, but really was very excited at the prospect of two babies. I just had to immediately give the entire situation to God. He had closed the womb for nearly a year and then given us twins — he must have something “very, very special” in mind for these little lives. My amazing and wonderful doctor in Maryland, the one who saved Kaleb, had told me after he was born that he didn’t anticipate the cervical issue happening again as there was zero reason for it to have happened in the first place. I just kept saying that to myself and trusting that there is a higher plan. I am going to have three children and that’s just what God intended from the beginning of time. It’s amazing the comfort found in that simple fact. God knows these babies by name and has counted every hair on their tiny heads. He is knitting them together right now in my womb and they are fearfully and wonderfully made. No matter what happens over the course of the next 5 months, there is solace in that. I am also finding a lot of peace in the support system I came to depend on through our ordeal with Kaleb. All of my friends and family constantly telling me that we are in their prayers is more invaluable than anyone realizes. Please continue to lift us up in your prayers and I will do my best to continue to update you on the progress with these little beans. I’m currently 15 weeks and 2 days pregnant today. I see my doctor again next week to begin weekly cervical checks to make sure all is quiet on the “southern” front. Your prayers are appreciated and honestly, longed for. I can’t wait to share this journey with you and the joy of welcoming two more little Spilman’s into our lives!

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Positive pregnancy test – 4.28.13

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First ultrasound revealing TWINS at 6 weeks 4 days

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Our official announcement

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12 week ultrasound – best pic the tech could get of both twins

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14 weeks pregnant with TWINS and looking much further along!

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